Toilet humor

Setting: Me!, on the toilet in the stall. A., not in the stall but in the bathroom. 

A. (turning off the light): "Just trying to help you out."


Me!: "I am 43 years old. Whatever I need to find, trust me, at this point I can find it in the dark."

Peace out!

A. and I are on the move. We've decided our new jobs, in a word, suckass. Since we came together, we're leaving together. Actually, I've already put in my notice, but A. suspects she'll be gonzo upon the morn.

I was worried about leaving A. If for nothing else, what would become of this blog? I just paid $8 for the URL. I need to recoup my investment, and given the Internet's prowess for ROI, that could take years. Plus, who else is going to kick me in Kohl's? (I said, "Oh, my God! You just kicked me." A. said, "You're damn right I did.")

So, this blog will now chronicle our transition from big shots back to little shots. I'm so good with the change, it makes me pee a little. And knowing A. is coming with me, well, makes me a pee a lot.

It is what it is - A. poem

the darkness knows no bounds

i am...
alone, without torment

my shot-gunned stapler mocks me,

"i am...

still here, why is that?"

i am...

working

the silence is maddening

i may not survive

no poking, no punching, no flicking

no sideswiped descent into drywall

no bruising of the old

how will i pee without counsel?

... or critique?

the ants are marching and so is A.

"flip-flop, flip-flop," her ginormous flippers cry

while chocolate waits, forewarned of the pending onslaught

delicious... 

yet targeted

plentiful? 

false!

the world holds its breath, markets quake

an industry's demise? an end of an era?

refresh your feed!

A. in PA

i am...

working

The small print: A. left work early on Friday to go to a Dave Matthew's concert in Pennsylvania and then spend the weekend. On Saturday, she was going to the Hershey factory. A. loves chocolate -- there may not be any left by the time she leaves. I, however, stayed behind and worked. I actually (kinda) missed her.

Breaking news

Set up iphone to post directly to blog for breaking news. Anticipating it will be worth it when A.'s pounding on my bathroom stall door.